Hi guys.

So, korang mcm mana? hmm... its holiday.. lol 1 week cuti mcm x de apa. balik kampung dekat penang pon kena jaga adik sedara lol what? mak pergi sebab ada urusan dkat sana sekejap. and so, hmm lol at my pic its mr bean. xD hahahaha okay okay hiraukan... just saya suka gambar tu ._. 

Okay, so... actually dah lama x update kan? last update pasal benda depressed tu hmm okay. mcm sakai pon ada bila baca but hakikatnya itulah perasaan kita yang sakai =_=. nevermind, so.. keadaan bertambah rumit sekarang. you know why? because HUMANS. yes, i'm a human too but i dont really like humans. i wonder why.... okay okay, feelings change and people  leave. yeap! thats right itu lah sebenarnya nak cakap.  Okay saya ada suka okay bukan suka je but sayang sangat2 dekat lelaki ni nama dia ((okay i shouldnt wrote his name here)) sokay ah buat nickname la hmmm nickname dia "N" okay la kan? hahaha okay N saya suka N sangat2.. tapi sayangnya dia x suka saya. well its okay. saya x kan paksa N untuk suka dekat saya. 

actually N ni boleh dikategorikan sebagai salah seorang yang pernah kapel dengan saya. yeap pandai awak teka kalau awak tahu siapa N ni. hmm, banyak perkara berubah sejak N pergi. and idk what just happend to me. i mean like, everyday i felt is only sadness and sorrow. and also, idk why do i love him so much. why why why why why why urgh =.= 

Letme tell you why, ehehehe ~

N... he was my first love. yes he is. he is the guy that make my heart beats faster you know. and i know i sound so greasfully but well its my feelings towards him you know. but it seems that N ni dia dah bahagia tanpa saya. yeah, dia pon dah suka orang lain kan... hmm, should i give up? and the answer is NO. 

yes. i wont give up on him eventhough its hurt a LOT i will try my best to get him back! yes!

N ILOVEYOU XD hehehehe 

yeah. saya gatai xD hahahahahah well, it just me. you know what? everytime saya fikirkan N ni saya rasa happy and i can feel him inside of me. and idk why ._. its like, it giving me strenghth... so i dont want to lose my strength. yeahh... and also... doa2kan la saya ya! heheheh... tapikan, saya rasa sedih sebab tahun ni dia last sekolah and saya lagi dua tahun nak habiskan sekolah. saya takot saya x sempat nak ckp dengan dia how much he means to me. saya takot sangat :( urghh... what should i do.... ARGH!!! *tarik rambot* okay lol nvm, i will try my best!!! wish me luck! HAHAHAHAHA okay guys